Calling it Quits

Why Resignation is as important as Resilience

Apr 16, 2025

So I have been thinking a lot lately about the idol of resilience. A short while ago I wrote a piece called “5 reasons not to quit.” A few days later I was telling a friend that I could also write an article about 5 reasons when it is time to quit.

Here’s the thing. Resilience is popular. Resignation is extremely unpopular. We don’t like to quit. There’s good reason for that and I don’t have time to go in to it here so what I will say is that we have subconsciously taught ourselves to push through anything and to endure all types of pain all in the name of resilience.

As my understanding of life with cancer and other chronic conditions continues to evolve, I’m learning that resignation can be just as important as resilience. In fact resignation, the ability and courage to quit something and to do so without guilt or shame, is a holy and sacred spiritual discipline.

Let’s be honest how many of us have hung on to things that we should have let go of all in the name of avoiding the shame associated with resignation? How many of us have been victims of shame fueled resilience? The act of enduring pain and discomfort because the shame of quitting was more painful than enduring?

As my body continues to change and adapt I’m learning to embrace resignation. I’m learning to accept the need to quit things that I really wanted to do but can’t. I’m also learning to quit things that I really never wanted to do but I committed to do it because of the pressure of my public persona of resilience.

I realize this isn’t a complete thought on this topic and I’ll probably write more about it later but for now..

Here’s some encouragement for those who need it. It’s ok to quit things you can’t do or no longer want to do. Resilience is important but it can also become an idol. If not careful we can idolize resilience and forget that resignation is a holy and sacred practice and often times a necessary part of our spiritual growth.

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